Suburbia by Troye Sivan - My Biggest Fear


Recently my very favourite song has been Suburbia, by Troye Sivan. It is a masterpiece, and I love and hate it at the same time.

It plays on all my biggest fears: that time passes too quickly for me to capture it.

I’m terrified that I’ll look back on my life someday, and think that I didn’t do enough. That I was too eager to move forward that I left what means the most to me behind.

Photo found on tumblr, click the image for the link.
In a few months, my entire life will change. I’m moving to a new city, my friends are all graduating, and some of them I’ll probably never see again. I know that this is the cycle of life, people grow up, change, and grow apart, but it is still what I am most terrified of.

Sometimes, I feel like what I want in life is not what’s best for me. All I really want is to move out, travel, meet new people and learn. Yet, this goes against everything that makes me happy. I love things that I’m familiar with. I love spending every summer at our cabin with the same people, I love family parties that I know are essentially boring. I love hanging out with the same friends at the same place every Friday night. I just love knowing what’s in store for me, and exactly what will happen. I don’t like change, and I don’t like facing new things.

This will be a good experience for me,  I know it. I just need something familiar to cling to.

Suburbia is just so incredibly beautiful, and fills me with emotion every time I listen to it. If I close my eyes, childhood memories come back. Visions of laughter, tree houses and summers spent at the beach, running into hugs from my parents. These are all happy memories, but tinged with the feeling that this is all gone, and I’ll never get it back.

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  1. I love this song <3 I know it's scary mmoving to a new place and dealing with all the changes that come with that but I know you'll do brilliant and everything will always end up how it's meant to be :)

    lots of love, Marianne xxx

    1. Thank you :) I'm sure it will, but as you said, it's very scary. Hopefully it'll work out!

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